Chapter 75

Dejectedly, Jon drove away, back to the big house on the riverside. Dot was up now, and he had coffee with her, not really talking much, then he got his stuff together and left for the plane.

His flight down to Florida was uneventful, but when he tried dialling Sara’s cellphone, it went straight onto voicemail, so he left another pleading message. Landing in Florida, Jon was picked up and taken to the hotel, where the other guys were already staying. On the way, he called Richie.

“Jon! Where are ya, buddy? I was startin’ to think you couldn’t tear yourself away from Sara.”

“Oh, fuck, bro - if you only knew. How’s Ava?”

“Ava’s great - she’s right here. Honey, say hi to Jon.”

“Hi Uncle Jon.” He heard Ava’s childishly cute voice.

“Hey pretty girl. Did you miss me?”

“Uh-huh. You coming here?”

“Yep. I’ll be there soon, kiddo. Lemme talk to your daddy again.”

“Jon. Has something happened?”

“Yeah, Rich, you could say that. I’ll tell you later.”

“I don’t like the sound of that, bro. Come see me when you get here. Bye.”

Arriving at the hotel, Jon managed to fake smiles for the fans who were waiting outside, signing autographs on his way in. Inside, the manager took him to his room then left him alone. Jon opened up some red wine, then he called Richie again.

“Hey, Rich. I’m here. Room eight thirty one.”

“I’m right next door. Gimme a minute.”

Hanging up the call, Richie turned to Ava, who was watching TV.

“Ava - I need to go next door, see your Uncle Jon. Will you be okay on your own for a few minutes?”

“Yes, daddy.” She replied, not taking her eyes off the screen.

“Okay - stay in the room, baby. I’ll be right next door.”

Ava nodded as Richie left the room, resenting any interruption of her cartoons. Richie knocked on Jon’s door, raising his eyebrows when Jon answered the door with a half-glass of red wine in his hand, walking back in and leaving Richie to close the door.

“Jon? What’s wrong?”

“I fucked it up, Rich. I really fucked it all up.”

“With Sara?”

“Yeah.” Jon gulped wine. “I said some things I shouldn’t have - God, I so shouldn’t have - and now she’s gone and she won’t talk to me. What am I gonna do?”

“Well, first, you’re gonna put down the wine and come do soundcheck, then we’ve got a show to do.”

“For the first time, ever, I don’t wanna get up there and play. I can’t face it, Richie.” Jon admitted, looking at him helplessly, and now Richie was worried.

“Jon - you may be a prick sometimes, but the one thing you’ve always been, no matter what, is a pro, and there are gonna be a lot of very disappointed people if you just throw a tantrum and don’t play. Like you kept on telling me when Heather and I were in trouble - just get your game face on and get out there.”

Jon laid his wine down and scrubbed his hands across his face. The thing was, he knew Richie was right, and he knew he had to do this show, even though he’d rather just crawl into a corner somewhere. He steeled himself, then stood up resolutely.

“Okay, bro. Let’s do this, then.”


Sara’s own flight had been okay, and once she landed at Heathrow, she had to go through immigration and customs before checking in for another flight, down to Newquay. While she waited for the plane, she put her cellphone on, to check for messages, and there was only one. When she played it back, tears formed instantly when she heard Jon’s voice, and she didn’t even listen to the whole message, just switched her phone off again. There was an elderly woman sitting nearby, and she looked across sympathetically when Sara virtually threw the phone into her bag.

“Are you okay, dear?”

“Hmmm? Oh, I’m fine.” Sara lied, feeling anything but fine. “Just a message from someone I don’t want to hear from right now.”

The woman nodded sagely. “Boyfriend? Have you had a fight?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“Well, it is to me, dear. So, what did he do? Was he cheating on you?”

Sara was a little taken aback by the woman’s direct question, but, well, she’d never see her again, so why not unburden herself a little. Maybe it’d help.

“No - he wasn’t cheating on me. He just said something that really hurt me, and I don’t know if I can forgive him.”

“Do you love him?”

Tears were forming again, and Sara could only nod silently.

“Does he love you?”

“He says he does. I think he does.”

“So give him another chance. You’ll always regret it if you don’t, believe me. Life is very short sometimes, my dear, and it’s certainly too short to waste on hate. When I was very much younger, I was in love with a young man, and we fought when he decided to join the army, to go to war. Back then, of course, we didn’t have mobile phones like now, and the army wouldn’t give out details of where men were stationed - security I suppose. Peter never came back - he was killed a few months later - and I never got to say I was sorry. I never got to say goodbye.” The old lady’s face was solemn, and Sara was suddenly appalled by the idea of never seeing Jon again.

“That’s terrible - I’m so sorry. You must have been devastated.”

“I was, but it was a very long time ago now. But you should give your young man another chance. At least let him try to make it up to you.”

“Maybe I will, if he calls again.”

The woman laughed. “My dear, any man who lets you slip through his fingers without a fight doesn’t deserve you.”

Just then, Sara’s flight was called, and she said goodbye to the old woman and headed for the gate. As she walked, she turned her phone on again and listened to all of Jon’s message. He really sounded upset - pleading with her to get in touch with him, any time she could. She began to dial his number, then realised she’d only have a few minutes before she had to turn her phone off again - not nearly long enough for them to sort anything out, so she cancelled the call and turned her phone off again.

When her flight arrived in Newquay, she was met by a representative of the Four Burrow hunt - the one she’d be photographing the next day. After introducing himself, he led Sara out to a battered Range Rover and drove her to a small hotel, where he left her, telling her he’d pick her up at seven the next morning. She checked in and went to her room, making herself some coffee - sadly it was instant, but at that moment it was better than nothing.

Out in Florida, Jon made it through soundcheck, finding that the routine helped take his mind off Sara a little. There was no support band tonight, so after soundcheck they had time to eat a quick dinner before changing for the show. Richie must have warned the other guys, because they were careful not to make any mention of Sara, trying not to piss Jon off too much, for the sake of the show. During the tour, there had been one day when they’d all been sniping at each other all afternoon, the gruelling schedule taking it’s toll, and it badly affected the show, to the extent that even loyal fans were referring to it as ‘Hell’, not ‘Hull’. If nothing else, it had been an unusually unprofessional thing for them to do, and none of them wanted a repeat of that night.

When it was showtime, Jon managed to bury his feelings to give his usual standard of performance, flirting with one or two of the girls down at the front. The crowd couldn’t tell anything was wrong, but Richie - closest to Jon - could see how much he was hurting. Every single song they played made Jon think of Sara, but the only time he was unable to keep it from showing was when they played Bed of Roses. The crowd probably thought it was all sweat streaking down Jon’s face, but Richie was close enough to see the tears breaking from the corners of his eyes, and he could hear the agony quavering in Jon’s voice. Unbidden, he stepped forward to the centre of the stage, standing next to Jon and singing the final chorus with him, camouflaging the breaks in Jon’s voice. Jon turned grateful eyes on him, giving a tiny nod as the song finished, then heading for the back of the stage to wipe his face and try to get it together again.

After the show, Tico, Dave and Hugh were heading out for a few drinks, but Richie begged off - he had to get back to Ava, who was being looked after at the hotel. Jon also slipped away, back to his room, checking his cellphone again in case he’d missed it ringing. Nothing. He poured himself some coffee and wearily sat down, too tired - emotionally and physically - to even drag himself to bed.

Sunday morning, Sara was up just after five am, and she took a quick shower then switched the little kettle on to boil. She picked up her cellphone and turned it on, then hesitantly dialled Jon’s number.

Jon was dozing fitfully on the couch when his phone buzzed. He groggily picked it up, looking at the display. Sara! Quickly, he punched the button to accept the call.

“Hello? Sara?”

“Hi Jon.”

“Oh, thank God, baby. I’m so glad you called. I am so, so sorry for what I said, for the way I acted.”

“I just wanted to let you know I’d calmed down a little, and that maybe we should talk once I get back. If you want to, that is.”

“Of course I want to, baby. I need you, Sara. I need you, I want you, and I love you.”

“And, despite my best efforts, I love you, Jon, even though you are an asshole sometimes. Anyway - I gotta go - somebody’s picking me up soon, and I have to get ready.”

“Okay, baby.” Jon hesitated before asking diffidently. “Can I call you later?”

“Sure you can. Bye, Jon.”

“Bye, baby. Have a great day.”

Jon was grinning as he laid his phone down. His exhaustion had evaporated, and he felt like he could take on the world, but instead he headed for bed. He slept for about three hours, waking up full of energy and itching to do something. Throwing on some sweats, he took himself down to the gym, then came back to his room, the intensive workout not even taking the edge off his bouyant mood. He was just coming back out of the shower when the hotel room phone rang.

“Hello? Oh, hey Richie. How ya doin?”

Richie blinked as he heard the tone of Jon’s voice - it hardly sounded like the guy who, the previous night, had been all but ready to throw himself off a bridge.

“Morning, Jon. Can I assume you’ve talked to Sara?”

“Yeah, bro - she called last night - or it may have been this morning - I’m not sure. How did you know?”

“Oh, I dunno.” Richie laughed. “Maybe because you don’t sound so suicidally depressed any more?”

“I do feel a whole lot better.” Jon agreed. “You had breakfast yet?”

“Uh, Jon - it’s only just after eight in the morning. Of course I haven’t had breakfast yet - I was calling to find out if you were hungry, or if you’d just drunk yourself unconscious last night.”

“Hey! I had coffee after the show, thanks very much, and I’ve already been to the gym this morning, and - yes - I’m starving. You ready to go eat now?”

“Yeah - Ava’s waiting - very impatiently.”

“Gimme two minutes to throw some clothes on and I’ll meet you outside.”

Jon quickly pulled on jeans and a Soul shirt, grinning as he remembered Sara in one of those shirts. He put on a pair of running shoes and headed out of his room, meeting Richie and Ava in the hallway. They went to the restaurant and ordered breakfast, then a few minutes later Tico, Hugh and Dave wandered in, so they ended up having a ‘family’ breakfast - the five of them and Ava. Dave looked questioningly at Richie, nodding toward Jon, and Richie just grinned and nodded.