Chapter 95

Sara began to tug her jeans back up, then hesitated and looked at Jon before grinning and just taking them off completely. Jon smirked back at her, kicking off his shoes and dropping his jeans on the floor too. They turned to go over to the bed, then Sara stopped.

“Wait a second.”

She went over to the door again, plucking the ‘do not disturb’ card from the back of the door, then unlocked the door and opened it a fraction, hanging the card on the outer handle, before locking them in again. While she did that, Jon had moved the bags off the bed and flicked the cover back, and he’d also divested himself of his shirt, sitting naked on the edge of the mattress, watching her approach.

Her t shirt was too short to cover anything below the waist, and Jon grinned as she walked across to stand between his knees, looking down at him for a moment before pulling the shirt off and dropping it with her already unfastened bra to the floor. Jon’s hands stroked her sides, drawing her a little closer, and he was still looking up at her as he pressed his lips gently to her stomach, not teasing, just kissing tenderly, and Sara caressed his head, smoothing his hair back from his forehead. They stayed like that, then Jon sighed gustily against her skin, turning to lay his cheek on her tummy, wrapping his arms around her back and holding her tight.

His emotions were running like a rollercoaster right now, and the elation he’d felt only minutes before was draining away, leaving him feeling empty and somehow scared, as though he was losing her all over again, even though he knew she’d be back in just a couple of weeks. He was pretty sure Sara was in the same state he was, but she certainly seemed to be handling it better, and he unconsciously tightened his grip on her as he felt her hand on his head again. It was an unaccustomed sensation for somebody who’d spent so many years in the public eye, so many years keeping his emotions under wraps, hidden deep away from the prying eyes of the media. Now, though, Jon felt like he couldn’t hide - maybe it was because he’d had to work to get Sara to open up - maybe it had forced him to open up again, too, but whatever the reason, it felt like there was something gnawing at his heart, an unutterable sadness spreading through him.

Sara ran her hands slowly down over his hair and across his back, resting them on his shoulders, then she looked down when she felt a hot drip of liquid trickle down her stomach.

“Jon?” When she spoke, puzzled, he raised his head again, and Sara saw the tears on his cheeks. “Oh, Jon! Don’t, baby, please don’t.”

All Sara’s attempts to keep her tears under control were blown away by Jon’s distressed gaze, and she felt her own eyes burning, teardrops spilling over her lashes when she blinked. She bent toward him, her hands cupping his face as she kissed his lips, tasting their tears on his skin. Jon just groaned and pulled her down with him onto the mattress, and they both shifted to the middle of the bed, hugging each other like they’d never let go.

Sara could feel the wetness on her shoulder from Jon’s tears, and she knew her own must be soaking his shoulder, too, as she tried to stop herself crying. Jon tightened his grip around her waist, rocking them both slightly and Sara gave up the fight, letting the tears come in an anguished outpouring, hoping they might wash away the pain. Slowly, they both got themselves under control, moving apart a tiny bit, wiping tears from each other’s faces with fingertips, trying to smile.

“There goes my image, huh?” Jon said huskily, and Sara frowned at him.

“Don’t, Jon. Don’t try to joke about this. Please.”

“I’m sorry, darlin’.” He smiled, then kissed her lightly.

He unwound the velvet band from her hair, pulling the knot loose and combing his fingers through her hair as he smiled at her.

“My beautiful girl.” He murmured, and Sara smiled back at him.

“You’re the beautiful one, Jon. Beautiful eyes.” She lightly touched the corners of his eyes with her fingertip. “Beautiful lips. Beautiful everything.”

Jon moved his head closer to Sara’s, just barely touching his lips to hers, tasting her and drawing back, then returning to lay his mouth more firmly on her lips, his tongue easing her mouth open now. Sara took his tongue into her mouth with a sigh, somehow knowing that they wouldn’t take this any further, not this time, and giving herself over to Jon’s loving mouth.

“I love you so much.” Sara whispered when they pulled apart, and she hesitated a second before saying what was in her mind. “Jon, I don’t want to go to the airport with you. I mean, I don’t want to say goodbye to you there. I can’t do it. I’ll end up getting on your plane if I’m with you at the airport.”

“And that’s a problem?” Jon quickly laid a fingertip on her lips before she could respond to that. “Sorry. I do understand, baby. Hell, if we arrived at the airport together I’d probably kidnap you and drag you with me, but I get it, really.”

Sara smiled at him gratefully, relieved that he understood, and pleased that he felt the same way. She rolled out of his arms and stood by the bed.

“I need to shower again.” She said almost apologetically, and disappeared to the bathroom.

She was only gone a few minutes, not needing to wash her hair, then while Sara dressed again Jon took another quick shower. When he came back to the bedroom, Sara was ready to leave, bag slung on her shoulder and her jacket draped across it. She’d steeled herself as best she could for this, and now she just needed to get through the next thirty seconds without breaking down, at least until she was out of his sight.

“I guess I’ll see you in a couple of weeks then.” She murmured, and Jon stepped closer, taking her hands in his.

“I’ll be waiting, Sara. Call me? Hell, keep your phone switched on - I can call you from the plane.”

“Baby, those airphones are so expensive.” She laughed suddenly as she realised how silly it was to say that to him, and Jon smiled, loving how she could so easily forget about his money, how she loved him for who he was, not what he had.

“I think I can afford it. Okay - you gotta go, right? Can I get a kiss goodbye?”

“Of course you can.”

It was a short kiss, though, with Sara pulling back as she felt her eyes tearing up again. Jon let her go without argument, just smiling at her tenderly as she grabbed her luggage. Unlocking the door, Sara dumped her bags into the corridor and turned one last time.

“Bye, Jon.” She whispered, hearing the tiniest crack in her own voice, hoping Jon hadn’t heard it.

He had, but he clenched his fists and forced himself to just keep smiling. “Bye, Sara. I’ll see you soon, darlin’.”

Sara opened her mouth to say something else, but closed it again, smiling bravely at Jon as she closed the door quietly behind her. The click of the door shutting had a terribly final sound to it, and from inside the room Jon heard a sob, quickly muffled, which tore at his heart. He dropped to sit on the edge of the bed, burying his head in his hands for a second, forcing himself not to go after her - especially not when all he was wearing was a towel!

Out in the corridor, Sara stopped her crying before it started again, giving vent to her emotions with a single, heartfelt, hiss of, “Fuck!”, quickly looking around to make sure nobody had heard her. She picked up her bags again and headed for the stairs, feeling as though she’d left something behind in the room. Nothing important. Just her heart.

Downstairs, she told the receptionist she was checking out, but that her boyfriend would be down soon with the key, since his flight was later than hers. The girl arranged a cab for her, and Sara walked outside to wait, gazing at the beach from the parking lot and smiling secretively to herself as the little bridge caught her attention. A cab pulled in, and the driver asked if she was going to the airport, loading up her bags when she said yes. Just before she got into the cab, Sara looked up at the bedroom window, seeing Jon standing watching her, dressed again, since she could see the black t shirt covering his chest. He smiled and raised a hand, and Sara gave him a wave and smile, getting into the cab fast, before the smile crumbled.

Her trip to the airport passed in a blur as Sara fought against her emotions, eventually getting herself back under control just before they arrived, and she paid off the driver and went to check in for her flight. Once her bags had gone, she headed for the nearest coffee shop, getting a large coffee and sitting down in a quiet corner. She’d looked at the food on offer, but just had no appetite at all right now, and she thought of calling Richie, as she’d promised, but realised it was ridiculously early in LA, so she’d have to wait until evening in the UK.

She was still lingering over her coffee when she heard a commotion over near the doors, and when she looked up she could see a small crowd gathering around somebody who’d just walked in, and she realised with dismay that it was Jon. While the crowd of people were around him, she swiftly grabbed her stuff and went over to the security point, knowing that Jon wouldn’t be going through there, since he was on a private flight.

At the doors, surrounded by a circle of people, Jon dutifully signed autographs for a few fans, forcing a smile onto his lips. As he reached to hand back a CD, a figure caught his eye, the long swinging stride unmistakable, and his smile slipped a little as he watched Sara disappear into the security area. He gazed that way for a long moment, then dragged his eyes and mind away, giving his attention back to the fans, then saying goodbye and escaping to the serenity of the private plane area of the small airport.

While he waited for his flight, Jon pulled out his cellphone, to call Sara, but found that her phone was switched off. Checking the time, he realised she was probably already boarding her flight, so he quickly sent her a text message, just saying he loved her, then a member of staff came over to tell him his plane was ready.

Sara had spent her waiting time staring blindly at a page of her book, not even attempting to read, but once she was on the plane she forced herself to pull out the laptop and try to do some work. If nothing else, she could usually immerse herself in the job and take her mind off anything that was troubling her. Didn’t work this time, though, she realised after she’d sat for ten minutes looking at the same picture, her eyes not seeing the horse and rider on the screen, but seeing Jon’s blue eyes. After a moment, she clicked through into another folder, pulling up one of the photos of Jon from Ryan Walker’s wedding. The second the picture opened, though, she knew it was a mistake, as she felt the burning behind her eyes when she saw his face.

“Fuck!” She hissed brokenly, earning herself a disapproving glare from the elderly man seated in the nearest seat.

She closed down the laptop and pushed it back into the bag, finding a tissue to wipe the tears away again, then the steward announced they were coming in to land, so she got her things ready for a quick grab when they arrived.

On the ground, she collected her luggage and left the baggage hall, finding yet another hunt member waiting with a nameboard, and she went over to introduce herself, then they headed on out to go to the hotel. Sara switched her cellphone back on as they walked, and it chimed that she had a text message, which she opened, finding it was short but extremely sweet - all it said was ‘I love you. J’.